I thought that if I filed a lawsuit, my husband would run after me, begging and begging me not to divorce. After all, we had been laying our heads on the same pillow for 22 years, and I had given him a 15-year-old boy with two girls, one aged 21, the other 18. Although if he ran after me and begged and burned me, I wasn’t going to forgive him.

However, the truth did not turn out at all as I had hoped. My husband jumped fishing on the divorce case I filed. our 22-year marriage ended in 15 minutes. My children wanted to stay with their father because they saw me as responsible for the divorce. Thus, on top of the divorce, the sadness of being separated from my children was added.

My mom kept telling me everything she could because I got divorced. He said that my father cheated on him at the time, but that was not a reason to get a divorce. Nevertheless, my feminine pride was hurt. Not getting divorced and accepting this was not something I could do. Even when I did this with my best friend. The compensation and alimony I received from my husband were not enough for such a thing. My mother had no income other than the pension left by my father, and the divorce compensation I received soon ran out of water. Now we were living only on alimony and my mother’s pension. But my mom kept pushing me to get a job all the time. She had been living alone for a long time, and with my arrival, her peace of mind had also fled.

Ben graduated from the Girls’ Vocational high school with the first place, but then I never worked. Where was I going to find a job and work after I was this age? However, I tried my luck and applied for several places. These were jobs like cooking, cleaning. But each of them turned out negatively. Because of my age and the fact that I had never worked before, no one wanted to hire me. On top of all these negativity, I was even more devastated when I heard that my husband had married Hale. Hale had taken both my husband and my children away from me.

I got depressed. I became angry with myself because I got divorced. At least I used to have a marriage that went well and badly, and I didn’t know what a livelihood problem was. My husband used to work and bring it, and I used to eat. But now the situations were tight. I met real life at the age of 42.

One day my childhood friend Müge visited from the neighborhood, and from that moment my life changed. He said to Müge, “Get me a job!” when I said, “OK, I’ll see!” said. Müge’s surroundings were wide. At least I would have tried my luck. Even though my friend Müge was not a solid shoe. He was married, but divorced. Because she cheated on her husband. After divorcing her husband, she also had relationships with many men. She worked in a clothing store. It was immediately obvious that he was the leading chav with his clothes, attire, state and movements. I asked such a woman to find me a job, but there was nothing else I could do.

A few days later, Muge called, “I found a job for you, write down the following address, there is Mr. Haldun there, go talk to him tomorrow, tell him that you got his address, his name or something from me!” he gave an address, saying. Then he said, “Ha, look at me, don’t dress like a peasant like that, dress up a little nicely, bread is in the lion’s mouth, girl, decorate a little!” he said with a laugh.

I was a hijab-wearing woman, and I never had customs such as decorating and tasseling, wearing clothes that showed my body contours. But what Müge said was also true. People were looking at these a little bit when hiring. The next day I wore my burgundy long-sleeved blouse with a black long skirt. I also wore a light makeup while tying my head with a sizeable turban with a black and white pattern. I put on my black, heeled shoes.

Divorce didn’t help me. When I was married, I used to go Decently between 60-65 kilos, and since my height was 1.70, I always looked thin. But because of the stress I experienced after the divorce, I gave myself up to food and gained 85 pounds. I couldn’t give away my extra pounds. That’s why my clothes were tight now. While my skirt made my butt quite obvious, my blouse also seemed to stick on me. My breasts were showing quite a bit. He was right when he said that the rich bread was in the lion’s mouth. I was going to endure it desperately.

I went out without taking my coat on. I felt like I was exposing myself in this way. While walking on the bus and on the road, I caught some men’s stares on me. I was very embarrassed, but I couldn’t say anything, I couldn’t do it. Even if I was wearing a hijab, they were looking at me because my body contours were obvious.

The address given by Müge was somewhere near Tarlabaşı. I’ve never been here before. I used to come to Taksim with my children and husband, we would walk along Istiklal street together, eat, shop. But these were places I never knew. The people I saw on the street were people I had never met before, not very mysterious. Honestly, I wasn’t afraid when I walked on the streets. I finally found the building by asking.

Müge said that the place I’m going to is a Casting agency, they select and send actors to movies, TV series and commercials. There was no sign at the entrance of the building, no name related to the company. Anyway, the building was quite old and it looked as if no one lived in it from the outside.

Agency 6. and it was on the top floor. Since there was no elevator, I walked up the stairs. My heart was pounding like crazy with excitement. I pressed the bell next to the old wooden door with two wings that rose up to the ceiling. A little later, there were sounds of heels from inside. A wing of the door, the paints of which were spilled in places, opened creakingly. a young girl who looked to be 25-26 years old and had quite intense makeup opened the door. He looked for 1-2 seconds and said, “Yes?” he said contemptuously. “Shey, I was going to meet with Mr. Haldun, from Mrs. Muge…” he interrupted me and said, “Wait a minute!” he closed the door on me, saying. I was shocked, but I couldn’t make a sound either. The sounds of heels came from inside again, and soon the door sash creaked open again.

This time there was a middle-aged man at the door. “Yes, yes?” when he said, “Shey, Mrs. Muge sent me.” I said shyly. The man said, “Mrs. Muge?” he said it as if he didn’t know. But then, “Oh, our crazy Muge, okay, are you a thing, or are you a Funda lady?” said. Muge apparently mentioned me, “Yes, it’s me, are you Mr. Haldun too?” when he said “Yes, yes, come in, come in!” he said, pointing inside with one hand.

It was actually a house, but it was used as an office. In the part that was the living room, there was an old and large table and a chair, and two old leather-covered armchairs with torn and ripped edges next to the window opposite. There was no computer or phone on the table. All the curtains were drawn even though it was daytime, and spotlights on the ceiling illuminated the inside. The air conditioner made the inside like ice, it was as if winter was happening inside in response to the heat outside. The paint on the walls had spilled out in places.

Mr. Haldun was a 45-46-year-old man with a top beard, who did not have any hair on his head. It looked like he shaved his hair like that. He was tall and thin. “Here you are!” so saying, he motioned for me to take the old seat. He also sat down in front of me. The girl meanwhile had seated herself in the chair behind the desk, but her scornful gaze was on me. By the way, the girl’s outfit was also strange. Dec. She was wearing a tiny black skirt that wasn’t even a mini. His hips, his legs were on the square. His legs shone as if they had been rubbed with oil. His ass was also protruding well. On the other hand, she was wearing a white singlet with a rope strap, and her black bra was visible under the white singlet, and her big breasts were visible as they were. And on her foot was a red shoe with quite high heels. She had her long blonde hair in a ponytail from behind.

Mr. Haldun said, “Please, I’m listening to you!” I got even more excited when he said. “Well, Mrs. Muge gave me your address, I’m looking for a job, so…” I said timidly. Mr. Haldun was staring at me from head to toe this Dec. His eyes were on my breasts, which were visible from under my blouse. I was annoyed by his looks, but I couldn’t say anything because I was embarrassed.

He looked at me for a long time without answering my words for a while. And then he said, “Hmm, tell me about yourself, where have you worked before, what have you done!” when I said, I didn’t know what to tell. Because my life was pretty empty. I got married at a young age and divorced after 22 years. when I said, “I have 3 children, I divorced my wife 2 years ago…”, he interrupted me and said, “So you’re divorced!” he said, raising one eyebrow in the air. As if you liked to hear that. “Hmm!” he said, shaking his head up and down.

“I’ll do cooking, cleaning, and so on.” when I said, the girl said with a laugh, “Food?” said. He was laughing hideously, mocking me. At that moment, Mr. Haldun turned to the girl and said, “Decapitation, please!” he said in a somewhat harsh tone. This remark of his made the girl’s face sour, but she still continued to laugh a little. Mr. Haldun said, “I understand, but we are not looking for such a person here!” my heart was broken when he said. “Health be to you!” I said, tilting my head forward. Mr. Haldun said, “You know, this is a casting agency, we select and send actors to commercials, movies and so on, we need someone like that. Mrs. Muge mentioned you, but I thought something like that would happen. I’m sorry!” said. “Anyway, have a health!” I said again, by the way, I got ready to get up. Dec.

Mr. Haldun said, “I’ll tell you what, you’ve come this far, if you want, let’s get you into our candidate pool, let the bosses take a look. If a suitable role comes up, we’ll let you know, how about?” said. “Well, how come I don’t know?” I said, embarrassed. While I was thinking about food, cleaning, Mr. Haldun was talking about acting.